Thoughts In The Night
by earthday
Summary: Ennis and Jack get close on a cold, stormy night on Brokeback Update:all parts now in one story
1. Chapter 1

**Thoughts In The Night**

**Part 1 in a short series I guess...Hope you like it! ^^ **

**Oh and I don't own any of these characters - they're the creation of the wonderful Annie Proulx! :)**

**And I know the character's personalities here are nothing like the ones in the film/book but I had fun writing them this way! ^^**

It was almost the middle of summer but on that night up in the mountains, the snow fell like winter had come early. A white thick blanket of it had already covered the vast meadows where just earlier that morning sheep had been grazing and all about the camp, a bitter chill had penetrated the air. So much so that even the trees seemed to be shivering, believable illusions in the dancing wind.

Wrapped tightly up together amongst the bedcovers in the tent were the two young cowboys, Jack and Ennis. They had been in each other's arms for at least three quarters of an hour now to try and keep warm from the constant snow and ever since then, Ennis had become increasingly curious about Jack. He'd never been this close to another man before but to be quite truthful, he quite liked it. The girl he had been with once had been pretty thin and delicate when they had held one another yet Jack was different. He felt strong and masculine and Ennis really enjoyed being with someone like that.

Gently, Jack stretched and arched his back, moaning a little. Ennis hung on, keeping his arms around his waist. '' Mmm...'' he muttered huskily after a while. '' Jack...''

'' Ennis...'' Jack closed his eyes and rested his hand on his companion's hip. '' ...you still cold?''

'' Hmm...a lil'...oh, when's it gonna stop snowin'?''

'' I dunno...Aguirre said it's a pretty bad storm.''

'' Great.'' Ennis groaned and shuffled a bit. '' Oh Jack...'' he hummed. '' Oh, hold me closer...''

Jack smiled and did as he was told so everything from their knees to their chests was touching. Ennis sighed, his hot breath tickling Jack's neck. He swore he felt him shiver a little.

'' Ennis,'' he moaned softly. '' Ah'm so cold...''

This seemed to be the excuse for his shudder. Ennis smiled.

'' Ah know,'' he muttered, sensing his icy skin underneath his clothes. '' Ah can feel it...''

Jack opened his eyes as Ennis's hand ran up his back and rested his head on his shoulder. Ennis couldn't help stroking his chocolate brown hair. Since they met, he'd always wondered what it felt like. As his fingers twisted around the curls, Jack uttered a small, low noise and relaxed against Ennis's shaking body. Ennis realised again how much he liked this close company. Or rather how curious he was about it...

Finally, Ennis's hand dropped from Jack's hair and came to rest on his shoulder. At his touch, Jack shuffled a little, getting slightly closer to his companion, if that was possible. Ennis smiled weakly and closed his eyes as Jack's scent came over him. He smelled like the mountain they had got so used to now, a mix of the old horses they rode upon and the pure nature that surrounded them. Ennis would often grow tired of the cold outdoors when it sapped his strength and made him wish for warm, burning fires but now he smelt it on Jack, it was very different.

Gently, he smiled again and let his head drift back onto the bedroll, going through his suddenly more alert senses. He'd smelt Jack and he was a subtle, delicate reminder of the environment they worked in. He'd heard Jack and he had the softest, richest Southern accent, tinged with hints of the West. He'd felt Jack, not just by accident now when their hands might brush while they were together in the day, and he was well-built and strong but not enough to be intimidating. And he'd seen Jack, an admittedly good-looking young guy with beautiful blue eyes and lips that turned up at the corners in an almost seductive way.

There was only one sense left. But before Ennis could curiously comprehend it, Jack moved again and shivered all over. Ennis hastily rubbed his arms to help him get warm but this didn't have any effect so he proceeded to roll over on top of him. Jack looked up at him, an element of surprise in his glittering eyes, yet still pulled Ennis further down. Ennis had never been in a situation like this before so for the first few moments, it felt very uncomfortable. Jack squirmed underneath him, trying to get in a better position, and finally, he ended up with one arm around Ennis's back and the opposite leg crossed over the other. Happy with this, Ennis groaned a little and eagerly straddled his companion before sinking down onto him so much it seemed like their bodies were one.

They remained like this for a good while, closer than they had ever been before and gradually, both of them began to fall asleep. Ennis was the first to go, his head dropping over Jack's shoulder tiredly. Jack smiled dozily at the comfort and then relaxed back onto the bedroll, closing his eyes. Before long, he drifted off too and for a long time, there was silence in the tent, apart from their soft, shallow breathing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thoughts In The Night**

Part 2 

Around half an hour later, they were still sleeping, tangled up in each other's arms. The bed covers had been kicked off a while back but despite this, neither of them was particularly cold, being tightly held together by a mess of hands and legs. In the dim light of the tent, they seemed like just one person.

Outside however, the snow was still cascading down, blowing more and more bitter winds across the mountain. Any animal out there now had retreated desperately to find slightly less harsh shelter and was using their thick fur or wool to the best of their ability. If it wasn't for that, they would have been frozen for sure, the temperatures were so low.

In the camp, the story was much the same. The fire had long since died down into a mass of frosty logs, the horses were shivering violently as they tried to sleep and the trees were being battered and thrashed by the icy breezes. Sometimes they blew so hard it was a wonder how some of the weaker ones weren't uprooted.

But, suddenly, as the winds started up another wailing song, there was a loud crack and the animals stirred a little in their sleep. In the tent, Ennis jumped and immediately woke up, arousing Jack as well.

'' What was that...?'' he moaned tiredly, rubbing his eyes.

Jack raised his head from the pillow a little and peered dozily around the small space they were in. The noise had definitely come from outside. '' Ah dunno...'' he muttered. '' Prob'ly a branch or somethin'...Don't really care...''

'' Mmm...'' Ennis agreed and sank back down again into his previous position. Jack sighed and then absent mindedly rolled on top of him, gently straddling his legs.

'' Jack...'' Ennis muttered dopily, liking this feeling. Jack was soft and light and for a while, Ennis was quite jealous of the horses that he rode.

Gently, he sat up a little so his knees were either side of Ennis's waist and then looked down at him, his breathing shallow. Ennis savoured the feeling of it on his face and neck for a little bit and smiled, placing his hands on Jack's arms. In the next few moments after that, he honestly thought they might kiss but Jack stayed where he was, just looking at him.

However, as Ennis glanced curiously at his lips, he wondered what it would feel like if they did kiss. He'd only ever kissed one person before, Alma, and despite that being the 'first one' that everybody raved about, it hadn't seemed that special to him, no matter how horrible that sounded. Just a random kiss at an outdoor movie screening one night in his friend's truck. Nothing else.

He wondered if Jack had kissed anyone before. It wasn't something he wanted to ask him but as he thought about it, he became quite envious of whoever had been with him in the past.

Yet, his siblings had told him that two men kissing was wrong. People of the same gender shouldn't be together, they'd said, and men and women should only fall in love with each other. But, as Ennis thought about it, he couldn't really find the 'wrong' part of two men or two women together. Maybe he was being naive (he had certainly been commented on like that before), yet he believed that everybody had rights to decide certain things. His Auntie had always said there were no reins on love.

This brought him onto the question of his sexuality. From a young age, he'd been brought up to believe that there were people who weren't queer and people who were, that was it. He'd always thought he wasn't queer but now, he was beginning to think quite lustful things about Jack. Maybe he had been wrong about himself, yet he didn't want to admit it – it seemed a rather big idea to comprehend.

Finally, he looked up from Jack's lips and into his sparkling, blue eyes, feeling himself melt. He was the most handsome guy he had ever seen and here in this intimate space, he found himself desperately admitting that. He could no longer control his feelings.

Gently, he slid his hands up Jack's arm, sensing his now cool skin underneath his jacket and thin shirt, and reached his neck, stroking it tenderly. After a long while being very close, their bodies suddenly felt far apart and quite cold. Ennis didn't like this at all, especially as the snow was still coming down harder than he had ever seen before, so, half for warmth and half in curiosity, he shuffled a little and arched his back, rubbing his sore hips against Jack's. Jack moaned huskily at this, his head going back, and Ennis found himself gasping, surprised at how good it felt.

But, after a bit, Jack sank back down so their bodies were close again and nuzzled into Ennis's neck. Ennis sighed, turning his head away from his companion. Jack smiled and then rolled off of him back onto the bedroll, moving his body so they were facing each other.

For a short while, they just looked at one another in silence, their eyes never straying elsewhere. The wind and the weather wailed outside but still, they took no notice of that. It was them and them alone in the tent and for those few moments, nothing more mattered.

Finally though, Jack shuffled and slid his arms inside Ennis's jacket, drawing him straight into an intimate embrace. Ennis did the same to him and soon, they were in the same position that they started the night with. However, just as they were getting comfortable, Jack pulled back a little and moved his hands around Ennis's shoulders, playing with his soft curls. As he again drew him closer, he thought they were going to embrace once more but instead, they began to kiss passionately.

Surprised, yet no less appreciative, Ennis moaned and pulled Jack nearer, shaking excitedly as he felt his bare skin through his shirt. Jack sighed and opened his mouth, immediately taking the lead. He seemed the more experienced of the two and had kissed another guy once before on some drunken night a couple of years back, whereas Ennis appeared a little more innocent and new to this. However, saying that, as Jack willingly pushed his tongue into Ennis's hot mouth, he groaned and instantly returned the kiss, tugging at his companion's jacket rather wildly.

Jack gladly helped him with this, though their lips still didn't part, and soon, both of their jackets were lying on the floor, thrown carelessly into a corner of the tent. They didn't care for the bitter, whispering cold anymore. All they were interested in was each other and getting as close and intimate as they could.

Roughly, Jack pulled at Ennis's hair and pushed him back onto the bedroll, getting on top of him. They carried on kissing hotly but soon, Ennis was pulling madly at the buttons on Jack's shirt, needing to get them open. Yet when he couldn't do it fast enough, he tugged at the material and forced them to part lips as he got it over his head.

Jack moaned excitedly when Ennis's hands ran over his back, making a hasty path up into his thick hair. He shivered, part from the cold and part from the pleasure, and then leant down, grabbing into Ennis's curls and kissing his neck. Ennis groaned when he did this, involuntarily bucking his hips as his tongue swirled over his extremely sensitive skin. Jack gasped.

'' Ennis...'' he whimpered, his voice dripping with delight. '' Oh Ennis...''

And for a few moments, he couldn't help holding Ennis in that same position so their hips were tightly pressed together. Ennis cried out passionately at the feeling, having never been touched like that before, and also at the thrilled, mixed noises coming from Jack's mouth.

'' Jack...'' he muttered dizzily, his head going back. '' Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack...''

His name slipped lustfully from his mouth as he held him but when he finally let him go, it vanished, being replaced with a few seconds of heavy breathing. Jack too joined him, his chest heaving with excitement. Sweat was already beginning to form on his forehead and he could feel his spine tingling with what seemed like electric shocks.

'' Oh Ennis...'' he gasped after a while, taking his companion's face in his hands. The sentence was interrupted with a short kiss. '' Ennis...God, ah don't know what's goin' on...''

'' Oh, me neither, Jack...'' Ennis smiled a little and rolled over on top of Jack, pinning his hands down. His eyes were big and sparkling with eagerness. '' But ah don't really care...''

Jack moaned huskily in agreement and ran his hands up Ennis's arms, managing to get his fingers underneath his shirt to feel his soft skin. Ennis sighed and began to kiss him, trying to copy the way he'd gone about it previously. But just as they were getting somewhere quite passionate, he suddenly remembered something and pulled away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thoughts In The Night**

Part 3 

'' Ennis – what are you...'' Jack started, sitting up a little and feeling a bit put off by this interruption.

'' Ah jus' thought...'' Ennis butted in. He sounded overexcited and overeager. Jack liked it. ''...ah found these the other day an' complet'ly forgot about 'em...''

Reluctantly, he got off of Jack and turned away from him, delving under the covers on all fours. Jack watched him curiously, a small smile on his face. His fingers itched to tug at Ennis's belt and jeans.

'' Ah, here we go!'' Ennis suddenly said and emerged from the sheets, his hair ruffled. In his hands, he was holding a small box, squashed from being in the bed. '' Ah got these a coupla days ago...''

'' What are they?'' Jack sat up further to get a better look and then reached out, opening the lid. Inside the box were quite a few berries, ripe and juicy. His mouth began to water.

'' Wow...'' he drooled. '' These make a nice change from beans.''

Ennis smiled and nudged his nose. '' Ah know...'' he murmured huskily. '' ...an' you have ta feed me...''

'' An' what law says that?'' But Jack's fingers were already in the box, searching around for a particularly sweet berry. When he'd found a good one, he raised his hand and fervently slipped it into Ennis's waiting mouth. Ennis moaned as he did so and Jack joined in, shuddering at the feeling of his wet tongue.

But, at last, his fingers dropped from his lips and back into the box. Ennis stared at him and accepted the next berry. And the next. And the next. So much so that when his turn was over, his mouth was stained with red juice. Jack glanced at it tantalisingly, wanting to lick it up so much, but Ennis lifted his head and distracted him. Their eyes immediately met.

'' Your go...'' Ennis teased and picked up a fruit from the box. Jack's lips parted and willingly accepted his companion's fingers, swallowing the berry and then seductively sucking them. Ennis whimpered, his eyes closing momentarily. Jack smiled a little at this and drew his fingers further into his mouth, right to the warm entrance of his throat where he provocatively swirled his tongue around them.

'' Jack...'' came Ennis's hot response as his head went back slightly. '' Oh, please keep doing that...''

Jack did as he was told and accepted another one of his fingers, thrilled at the satisfied moan he got in return. The other berries had obviously been totally forgotten about now and they were again more interested in each other than anything else. So, gradually, as he began to push Ennis's fingers back towards the front of his mouth, Jack took the box from his hands and placed it in the corner of the tent. Ennis groaned and without even needing any prompting, sank onto the bedroll. Jack got on top of him, finally opening his mouth again.

'' Ennis...'' he sighed as his companion pulled his hand back. '' Oh Ennis...''

And he leant down, starting to roughly kiss at his neck. Ennis uttered a quiet noise and shuffled underneath him, glancing absent mindedly over his shoulder. Resting in the bed covers was the whiskey bottle that they had brought in earlier but had forgotten about in all the confusion. Yet now it seemed like quite an appropriate time.

'' Jack...'' he muttered after a while, putting his hands on his shoulders. '' Mmm, Jack, wait a minute...''

'' Hmm?'' Gradually, Jack pulled away and looked down at Ennis who nodded in the direction of the bottle. A smile appeared on his face as he realised what he was signalling at and he immediately reached over for it, taking out the loose cork. There was still a good deal of whiskey left in there, considering they'd been up working in the fields most of the day, so Jack eagerly tipped it up and poured the liquid down his throat, letting none of it escape. Ennis watched him happily, a small grin on his lips. He liked so many things about Jack at that moment, from the way his eyes closed as he drank to the frequent flick of his tongue around the neck of the bottle. He really was quite a pretty little cowboy...

Finally, Jack took one last swig of the whiskey and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, offering the drink to Ennis. Ennis smiled and gratefully took the bottle. But as he slipped it past his lips, even before the liquid touched his tongue, he was aware of a rich, seductive taste all around the glass of the neck. It wasn't the whiskey, that was for sure – Ennis had tasted whiskey enough to know what it was like – but something else. Something softer, more suggesting, even more pleasing...

After a short while of letting his tongue roam the glass, he finally got it. It was Jack, it must have been. He'd drank from the bottle and now his taste had been temporarily imprinted on it. And Ennis liked it a lot. So much so that he became more interested in that than the actual whiskey.

But, just as he was really beginning to savour it, Jack grabbed the bottle from his hands and drew it away, spilling a few drops. Ennis looked up at him, a little confused. He'd hardly drank anything, apart from his companion's delicious taste. Yet Jack still didn't give it back.

'' Open your mouth...'' he commanded instead, suddenly seeming quite excited. A curious Ennis did as he was told, instinctively closing his eyes too.

He gasped shortly as the whiskey splashed down onto him. Jack was obviously aiming for his lips but had missed by a little way, sending tiny drops sliding over his skin. It was quite a shock yet Ennis still quite liked it, as strange as that sounded to him.

And, somewhere along the line, when Jack fed the bottle into his eager mouth, he felt a stray droplet trickle from his lips and make a wet trail down his neck and throat. Involuntarily, he shivered and momentarily distracted him his companion from the whiskey.

'' Ennis...?'' Jack breathed but then he saw the liquid running down his skin and he smiled. '' Oh Ennis...''

And with that, he playfully began to follow the drop as it wound its way over Ennis, leaning closer to him. Ennis willingly let him do what he wanted to do and rested his head back on the pillow behind him. To start with, it was all quite innocent fun, what with Jack trying to keep the water from stopping, but then after a while, it slipped inside Ennis's shirt and he surprised himself by gasping sharply.

Happy with his sudden delight, Jack spread his legs wider over Ennis's hips to get in a better position and undid the first button on his top, allowing the drop to again spill more freely. And as it trickled further down, he happily opened more buttons so gradually, Ennis's bare chest was revealed.

Jack smiled to himself when he quietly sighed his name. He loved the way he said it in that rough, deep Western accent, the vowels sometimes lengthened. But, come to think about it, he loved everything about Ennis and secretly had almost ever since he'd first met him. Those dark but strangely soft eyes, those lazy blonde curls, that rather boyish smile...And the little things he did too. Like when sometimes on a clear beautiful night, they'd sleep outside by the campfire for a while and he'd fall tiredly onto the leafy ground after a long day's work. One time he'd flopped down the opposite way to usual and ended up across Jack's lap. Somewhere in his sleepy mind, Jack knew he'd realised but he was glad he didn't move.

So, even before this night, Jack had wondered what it would be like to kiss and hold him closer. He'd been told from a very young age that two men kissing was wrong but he didn't care about that anymore. Before he knew Ennis, he'd briefly been with another guy up on Brokeback and even though that had been more of a drunken affair than anything else, he'd still got used to his feelings.

Yet he hadn't felt what he felt for Ennis about Dakota. No, his thoughts about Ennis were completely different and admittedly went further than anything he had ever done with his past companion. Somehow though, that didn't scare him at all. Nobody could tell him what he could and couldn't think.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thoughts In The Night**

Part 4

Finally, Ennis murmured his name again and Jack came round, back into reality. The drop of whiskey had slipped past the last button on his shirt, which had been undone quite a while ago, and had nestled into his belt, staying there. Jack curiously ran his fingers over the buckle and loops, making Ennis's breath catch in his throat, but then decided against it, instead guiding his hands up his chest and pulling his shirt back.

'' Jack...'' Ennis sighed and felt his fingers twist into his hair. He gasped as he pulled it roughly, drawing his head backwards and revealing his ivory white neck.

Jack admired him for a little while, liking how he was now completely helpless, and then traced down the damp trail the whiskey had left. Once he had teased Ennis enough, he finally leant closer and breathed hot breath over his skin. Ennis sighed in pleasure. At this, Jack smiled and slowly opened his mouth, letting his teeth graze his jaw in such a way to make him squirm.

'' Oh Jack...'' he moaned, raising his hips a little. '' Jack...''

Jack shuffled at the sudden movement, tracing a hand up Ennis's back (his hips went up further) and flicked his tongue out over his neck, swirling it like he did earlier. Ennis groaned, even more so as he began to travel down, over his throat, then his collarbone and to his chest.

'' Ennis...'' came his rough voice after a while for no particular reason. They hadn't said anything to each other, other than their names and some other random one-off words, for what seemed like ages. But, strangely this was quite nice. They'd done enough talking earlier by the campfire before the snow started to fall.

Gradually, Jack travelled further down Ennis's chest and nuzzled at any skin he could reach, fast enough to follow the whiskey trail before it dried yet slow enough to drive him crazy.

'' Jack...'' he murmured, weaving his hands into his thick hair and grabbing it. Jack smiled and kissed at his stomach, making sure his eyelashes brushed his bare flesh. Ennis's back arched. '' Jack!''

'' Ennis...'' came the playful, rather mocking response. With another grin (he could feel how fast Ennis's chest was heaving), he moved even further down and teased his teeth over his companion's belt, briefly pulling at the straps. Ennis, obviously now wild with excitement, excitedly bucked his hips. '' Oh Jack!'' he cried.

Jack smiled at his approval and then hastily turned him onto his front, kneeling beside his waist. Ennis let out a long, shaking breath and glanced over his shoulder, meeting his eyes. For a while, they attempted to control their heavy desires but it didn't last long. Almost immediately, Jack leant back down and they kissed ever so passionately.

Softly, Ennis moaned into their intimacy and tried to roll over onto his back again to make it easier. Yet, before he could get that far, Jack pushed him playfully and straddled his legs, stopping any further movement from his companion. Their lips immediately parted.

'' Jack...'' Ennis murmured dizzily, trying to get a desperate hold on reality. Everything apart from the handsome cowboy with him and the tent seemed to be slipping slowly away and he just couldn't think straight anymore. For a few moments, his mind was full of wild fantasies that he wished would come true.

Oh my, he wanted Jack so, so bad.

*****

Finally, Jack fell down beside Ennis and pulled his jeans back up, drawing the bed sheets over them. He could feel how much Ennis was shaking so tenderly, he turned him over onto his side and wrapped his arm around his stomach. '' Oh Jack...'' he whispered, barely able to speak. '' Oh Jack, Jack, Jack...''

'' Ssh...'' Jack nuzzled sweetly into his soft curls and helped him do up his jeans when his fingers were proved useless from all the trembling. '' It's alright...''

'' Oh Jack...'' Ennis sighed, holding his arm around him. After the rampant loudness they had just gone through with, he liked the sensitive, gentle side of his fellow cowboy. Especially as he was beginning to feel quite sore and maybe a little confused too.

But, for a little while, he relished the intimacy they shared, savouring how warm Jack was. He loved how happy they were together and wished he could hold him like this forever. Not go up to the sheep tomorrow or face Aguirre but just stay here in Jack's arms, embracing him all through the summer.

Yet something was bothering him. So, after a bit, he shuffled and reluctantly opened his eyes, momentarily taking in how messy the tent had become after everything that had gone on. Jack fidgeted as he moved, refusing to let go. Ennis appreciated that but he still raised his head a little and glanced round to look at his companion.

'' Jack...?'' he muttered when he didn't notice him. '' Jack...?''

And slowly, Jack opened his eyes too, blinking up at Ennis. Ennis's heart leapt into his throat. '' Mmm?'' he moaned softly.

'' Oh Jack...'' He turned back onto his side and exhaled. '' Jack...''

'' Hey...'' Jack said gently, propping himself up onto his elbow. '' What's wrong?''

'' Mmm...'' Ennis hummed. '' Oh Jack, it's jus'...Was that meant ta happen?''

'' What's that?''

'' Y'know...the kissin' an' playin' an'...whatever...''

Jack just smiled and stroked Ennis's curls, smoothing and running his fingers through them. '' Oh Ennis...'' he muttered tenderly, leaning back down to draw him into another embrace. '' Why d'you ask that?''

'' Well...ah dunno...It's jus'...Ah was always told two guys kissin' was wrong. An' if anyone finds out...We're dead, Jack...''

Jack sighed and nuzzled into Ennis's hair, making him purr softly. '' Oh Ennis...'' he murmured. '' Ah'm so sorry...''

Ennis shuffled and put his hand over his. '' What for...?'' he asked quietly.

'' Oh, ah dunno...Jus'...everythin' ah s'pose...''

'' Oh, Jack, s'no need ta be sorry...That was amazing – what jus' happened, ah mean...''

'' Mmm...'' Jack nodded slowly, as if there was something else on his mind. '' But ah – ah – ah didn't mean...'' He paused and sighed. '' It doesn't matter...''

Ennis smiled and closed his eyes, cuddling closer into Jack's warm body and pulling the sheets tighter over them. '' Goodnight, Jack...'' he murmured softly. Jack nuzzled into his neck, feeling a sudden rush of sadness splash into his stomach.

'' Goodnight, Ennis...'' he whispered, barely able to speak any louder.

And gradually, sleep claimed them, taking Ennis into its comforting arms first. Jack rocked against him as he heard his breathing become more shallow and soon felt tears stinging his eyes. He tried to fight them back but in the end, he couldn't, forcing himself to allow them to drip down his cheeks. Even when he began to sob softly, Ennis still didn't stir beside him, except from a quiet sigh. Jack moaned. Then when he was sure he was completely lost in his dreams, he leaned a little closer and muttered six little words into his ear.

'' I love you, Ennis Del Mar...''

Sleep then claimed his weary body, pulling him away from his troubles for a few hours into a warmer, gentler world.

THE END


End file.
